This is an interesting topic, and one that could be argued till the end of time I guess. I recently initiated another conversation with the well known engine builder I know about the subject, and here is a pointed summery of our conversation. (from memory so I could have some of it a little wrong)
1) Modern oils are extremely difficult to break down under non-racing environments (typical road driving). Basically says, even some of the cheapest oils are very resilient. The oil hasn't been a problem in 20+ years.
2) Modern oil filters are better is some ways, and not others. Good (less media tear potential and more reliable bypass valves). Bad (overall less filtering volume). He still believes the "weak link" is indeed the filter.
3) Modern engines tend to have slightly tighter clearances in some area's (Cam,Crank,Piston-Bore), but use better material, process and support structure. So while smaller particulate can have an adverse effect on some sections of an engine, the material and processes help mitigate harm so it's not noticed.
4) It doesn't matter how well an engine and it's respective parts are designed, manufactured, cleaned, and assembled (race or road), they ALL will throw off metal and other particulate during and after the break-in process. If everything goes well, the filter will remove the larger more destructive material before it ever has a chance to cause noticeable damage.
5) Always, without exception follow at least the minimum manufacture requirements for warranty procurement, but increase intervals for better long term life.
This is the reason why he highly recommends changing the oil and filter on new engines at 1k and then 3K. After which he recommends 3-5K, but not because of oil break down, but because of filter volume and media tear. He again stated as the media in the filter loads up, the bypass will open at lower engine RPM's (less filtering)
He did make it a point to note the difference between noticeable and unnoticeable damage. Something like unnoticeable damage = premature wear that you may or may not ever notice. While noticeable damage could result in loss of performance, function or catastrophic failure. Most manufacturers are only interested in what he calls noticeable damages.
If I understood everything he was saying, and I'm sure I didn't (cabpatch). I took this main point away from the conversation. It's important to find a balance between waste and acceptable damage/wear, because the cleaner the oil the better protected my engine is against internal wear/damage.
For me, I'm going to stick with his advice, which I've been following for quite a long time, and have never had any internal engine failure.