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Black Majik MSP
12-08-2003, 04:28 AM
If anyone else is like me & needs a little cheering up, these should do the trick. ENJOY! :D


THE FIVE SECRETS OF A PERFECT RELATIONSHIP FOR A MAN

1. It is important to find a woman who helps at home, who cooks from time to time, cleans up and has a job.

2. It is important to find a woman who can make you laugh.

3. It is important to find a woman who you can trust and who doesn't lie to you.

4. It is important to find a woman who is good in bed and who likes to be with you.

5. It is very important that these four women don't know each other.


Twas the night before Christmas and caught at the light,
Was a domestic V8 and no cops in sight,
I will try, I will try, I will try with this small motor,
To beat this #### Mustang, even with it's big power,
As the light goes green and I pull like no joke,
The Mustang erupts in clouds of tire smoke,
Now Smasher, now Rev-ver, now Stroker, now Blitzin,
These are the names of my four VTEC pistons,
Racing ahead I'm the Star of the Action,
But I know I'm in trouble when that V8 gets traction,
Grabbing second, I hear the RPM sing,
My mirror is blocked by my Shopping Kart Wing,
I now hear the roar, of that big monster gaining,
All I can do is keep that four-banger straining,
In a second, the shockwave hits with a blast,
And my stickers go flying now, a thing of the past,
Don't bother with third, cause now it's too late,
Just try to act cool, like you can relate,
Looking up at the taillights as they get smaller,
The driver backs off just to give me a holler,
"You can't win them all," he says in fling,
"You may not win any, in that silly thing",
I scowled and revved and let out a sigh,
And did my trademark high-speed fly-by

Black Majik MSP
12-08-2003, 04:38 AM
Technically it's now Monday, but when you read this, please don't forget about December 7th & the soldiers who died for our country. I didn't see any other threads on the board about it. So when you get a laugh out of this, remember those people & the soldiers who are deployed right now. (usa)

vodapas77
12-08-2003, 04:49 AM
Thank you for remembering. We've still got another hour and 15 min. of Dec. 7th here in Hawaii. The Navy held it's yearly ceremony this morning in rememberance of that "day that will live in infamy." I am no longer deployed and I drive by the old battleship row on a regular basis. It always seems somewhat mournful when I do. While I may be with my wife this holiday season, my thoughts are with my shipmates and brothers/sisters in arms who are not with their families. Good luck to Justin and Wendy as they deploy this year my prayers are with you and all of those who can not be home for this time of year and always for all of those who are still "out on patrol."

Black Majik MSP
12-08-2003, 08:32 PM
BUMP for both of my posts!

Midnight22
12-08-2003, 08:37 PM
i like this one better... :D

T'was the night before Christmas and caught at the light,
Was a rotary sports car and no cops in sight,
I will try, I will try, I will try with this small motor,
To beat this shit 7 with it's puny two rotor.

As the light goes green and I pull like no joke,
The 7 erupts in clouds of tire smoke,
Now Smasher, now Rev-ver, now Stroker, now Blitzin,
These are the names of my four VTEC pistons.

Racing ahead I'm the star of the action,
But I know I'm in trouble when the 7 gets traction,
A quick grab to second, I hear my revs sing,
My mirror is blocked by my shopping cart wing.
I now hear the scream, of that rotary gaining,
All I can do is keep the four-banger straining.

In a second, the shockwave hits with a blast,
And my stickers go flying now, a thing of the past.
Don't bother with third, cause now it's too late,
Just try to act cool, like you can relate.

Looking at his taillights as they are gettin much smaller,
The driver backs off just to give me a holler.
"You can't win them all," his wrist he did fling,
"You may not win much in that stupid rice thing".

I scowled and revved and let out a sigh,
And did my trademark high-speed fly-by.

Aricjm15
12-08-2003, 08:42 PM
you changed like 4 words

Black Majik MSP
12-08-2003, 08:43 PM
HA HA HA nice job...much more appropriate for this site! (rofl)

Black Majik MSP
12-08-2003, 08:44 PM
Originally posted by Aricjm15
you changed like 4 words

His sounds a lot better than the original though. :D

Midnight22
12-08-2003, 08:53 PM
lol, i didnt change it, i found it on the eclipse site i visit, lol, i was like yeah props to the mazda peeps, they all agreed with me :)

StarvingRussian
12-09-2003, 12:29 AM
i hate the high-speed ricer fly-by with the hazard lights flashing.